Ex-boyfriends

I went to have lunch with my ex-beau on Saturday - we had a fine lunch. I got to see his new home which is really beautiful and stylish just like I expected it to be. Among many thing he is a style mavin.

It's funny I don't know why it's the case with me but I am friends with most all of my Ex's or most of the men I've dated for any length of time. I feel like, they were interesting men before I made out with them and I still like them as people, so I generally continue a friendship with them [ok, ok.. NOT the ex-husband he's still an asshole]. Most people don't understand it but it works for me so what the hay ya know?

It doesn't always end as peacefully as it might sound, there is generally a time of not speaking, sometimes of anger, sometimes of hurt but we all have seemed to work through it in the end. In the case with Saturday's beau, we lived together, divided the things, fought over who got the apartment, hung up on one-another, called each other asshole and bitch a few times before it was resolved. This out of the many men was the hardest to get through and there were times when I questioned how I ever loved this man because it became so bitter. A friend says you can tell a lot about someone in how they break up with another. This is true and sometimes it's full of emotion and isn't pretty.

Roger and I were so good on paper. He's a extremely talented photographer, me an artist and creative person, he's a stylish guy, I'm a stylie girl, we were looking for the same things. Somehow it just wasn't enough and I ended up being the meanie that left first. I know [because we have both said it out loud] that we learned a lot about ourselves and from each other from that 2+ year period of time. For me I think it was a test, can you really stand up for yourself this time? If so, will you do it? I took me a while but I did.

Oddly, the best part of our get together wasn't about him but happened on my car ride there. When I thought about how wonderful it was to have a current love that understood this, or didn't, but let me do it anyway. He is so secure with himself and us, that he lets me do this if I want to. I don't know if I would be as open if the shoe was on the other foot. I'm jealous of the ex's no matter what. Somehow he knows that it's all fine. I think he also knows that I love him dearly, more than I ever thought I could love someone. In the end this is what makes a relationship - even with the ex's in the picture or not.

I'm glad to have all the ex's in my life, they are good men and I'm proud of them as much as I'm sure they are proud of me. We had some good times, learned a lot and in the end remained good people and that is what I'm most proud of.