My 20 yr highschool reunion is in a couple of weeks. I don't know if I want to go...I mean I want to go just to be a fly on the wall but I really don't WANT to go and talk to people. I was suppose to be on location but the shoot has been rescheduled so there the question hangs to go or not to go?
I moved to Southern California during my 6th grade year from Sacramento. I was still playing with dolls and playing hopscotch and I got to SoCal and the girls were talking about BJ's and smoking pot. Lets just say I never fit in from that point on.
I still live fairly close to the community I graduated from and on occassion I see someone from school, a few who have been very nice and glad to catch up with along with the occasional cheerleader who even after giving another chance as an adult, I still don't care for.
When I think about going back all of those old insecurities come back, the chubby girl with bad clothes who hadn't figured out her own style, the torment I felt as some of the girls either laughed as I walked by or didn't give me the time of day. Kids can be so cruel that is for sure.
I do have a few positive memories of H.S one of which was from my advertising art class. The class where all the punk rock kids got placed because they were bad students and had too much energy. Here I was, this little preppy girl with good grades sitting in between boys with punk hair who got pulled over by the police on a regular basis and came to school telling me stories of concerts with men naked on stage except for a sock [Yes, the early years of the Chili Peppers thank you]. Those boys saved my life, they let me into their world and said hi to me in the hallways. They always threatned to come pick me up on a Sat night to take me out on the town with them but considering my step father had me on lock down we all knew it wouldn't happen. It was one of the few places I felt whole and like myself, one of the reasons I ended up in advertising as well. On the inside I was punk rock but I didn't have the courage to look like them.
As I've grown up and figured my shit out I'm still punk rock on the inside but really and truly the preppy girl on the outside. I'm cool with it now it's a great little secret I get to carry around with me. I did get to go out with them in college and later dated one for a bit of time. He is still one of my most cherished friends.
We'll see. I put a email out to my HS girlfriend this am and we're contemplating it. We've both done really well for ourselves and look better now than ever. I suppose that is some really good revenge and one benefit from not having children [for me]. On our 10yr we both went to the bar and had a few drinks then snuck in when someone wasn't looking. Think we're going to go for it again. Hell, I'm definitely not paying to see those people!
why the photo...
in HS I drove a 1969 white bug with red interior. That was one groovie little car and we chased a lot of boys in it. Not that I would have known what to do with them if I ever caught them!
No comments:
Post a Comment